Keep Calm...I'm Married!!!!

Hi Blogger!!!!! Excuse me while I blow the dust off of this bad boy. *Inhale followed by a blow*
Wow this is crazy. I last published something on this blog two years ago. I'm sorry. I know, I abandoned you after I let you alllll the way in. I'm an awful person and I get it. Well where we last left off I was going through a breakup and as you can see that's no longer the case. The long relationship I was trying to get over actually turned into a marriage and I'm no longer the bitter Betty that I was in my last post. I've been married for about 5 months now, so it's still pretty fresh. The planning of the wedding was a stressful headache and if any of you are looking for tips...stay tuned.

And to answer the question everyone is dying to ask when they find out you are a newlywed ......NO I'M NOT PREGNANT AND NO WE AREN'T TRYING. Lmao. GIVE ME PEACE!

For real though....married life is cool. It's like a never ending sleep over with your best friend. You can't beat that. My interests are all over the place now. In my hiatus I've picked up photography and gaming as hobbies. When I say gaming I mean SIMS 4....but I digress. I'm learning how to cook, clean, and be domesticated (which is HARD WORK). Living with my mom had me spoiled as hell and I had no idea what it took to  make a house a home. It's not easy being a wife. The adjustment of living for someone else and doing things to keep afloat as a unit. Whew! The stress honey! As difficult as it is, I'm so grateful to have found my other half and all of this is worth it. I could write a book at this point in my life, but for now I guess blogger will be my outlet. Lol.


Hope you guys are well and are going through positive changes in your life as well. Sending positive vibes to all my queens! Keep your crowns up! Oh and Merry Christmas! 

Black Man

The creature they look at in such a strange way.
You baffle them, confuse them, take them mentally to another place.

Such strength in your body, love in your soul, passion running through your veins
to accomplish all of your goals.

But they wouldn't know...They're not going to believe that you have dreams because the
painted scenes on the T.V. screens speak reality.

Unfortunately reality screams killers and thieves...Far removed from the likeness of
powerful beings like Martin Luther King.

No, the black men of today are considered a different thing. No longer human beings, your lives have no meaning. Killing one another and shocked when you are murdered by others.

Black man partaking in any old illegal thing just to reach the "American Dream" by any means.
Please black man stop giving therm a reason to shoot. Always keep in mind that they don't pity you.

They never walked in your shoes, they have no clue. They didn't have to work twice as hard as you to get twice as far. Life is hard. Your mouth didn't have a silver spoon, so you know why you do what you do.

But listen up black man, keep thinking about it that way and there will be no hope for our race. Getting money the fast way will be a pointless endeavor if you catch a case.

The Tantalizer

I glance your way, and get locked into your gaze. Those eyes, that smell, I know them very well.




Thump, Thump, Thump. It pounds  and I'm consumed into the world of you.

I TRUST........

The Other Day I Went To The Library And Picked Up A Book ( If My Boyfriend Saw This Book He Would Think I Was So Corny). The Book Is Called " The Couple's Comfort Book" By Jennifer Louden. This Book Is Pretty Cool, It's Filled With Tons Of Scenarios/Issues That Couples Go Through And It Provides Ways For Couples To Get Past Those Issues. One Section In That Book Which Touched The Nail On The Head For Me Was The Section On Having Trust For Your Partner.

I Feel Like A Horrible Girlfriend Sometimes Because I Admit That Although I Love My Boyfriend Up Until A Month Ago I Didn't Completely TRUST Him. I'm Not Talking About Any Type Of Trust, I'm Talking About The Close My Eyes....Go Outta Town For Six Months...Not Caring Who In The Hell He's On The Phone Texting And Myspacing Cuz I Got That Ass On Lock Trust. A Month Ago Me And The Boo Got Into It Because He Had Gotten A Co Workers Screen Name And I Didn't Like It Because I Felt A Little Threatened....We Both Work In The Same Place And I Know The Girl He Got The Screen Name From But I've Never Had A Conversation With Her( Yet Those Two Had A Friendly/Play Fighting/Flirty Connection). I Felt A Little Uneasy When I Found Out But Because I Vented This To My Boyfriend He Says That He KNOWS For A Fact That I Don't Have Trust In Him And It Clicked To Me In That Moment That I Didn't. I Kept It Real With Him And Told Him I Only Trusted Him 96%...LMAO...Who Says That? So Anywho He Was Offended And I Feel Like I Was Wrong Because He's Never Given Me Any Reason To Believe He Is A Cheat. Why Did My Heart Refuse To Trust Him? After My 96% Confession He Asked Me To Trust Him 100% And From Then On I Have Let Go.... I'm Loving Him With My Eyes Closed And With My Heart In The Air. Lately I Have Been Doing Some Soul Searching And I'm Seeing That Being A Jealous, Overbearing, And Paranoid Girlfriend Is Doing Nothing But Adding Unnecessary Stress To Our Relationship. I'm Not Saying Mister Man Is Perfect ( Cuz He Has Many Faults) But I Don't Give Him Credit Where It Is Due....I Just Automatically Assume The Worst Of Him.

I'm Letting Go Because:

1. I'm In Love Dammit Hell Yea I'm Gonna Enjoy!


2. He's Done Nothing Wrong For Me To Be Investigating And Paranoid About


3. He's Done More Than Enough To Show That He Cares


4. He Is Not His Friends...Just Because They Cheat Doesn't Mean He Will..He's Not Some Mindless Robot.


5. Trust Is The Corner Stone Of A Relationship, If You Don't Have That Then You Don't Have Jack Shit


6. LAST BUT NOT LEAST: I Said Yes To Being His Girlfriend...I Took A Risk, Fell In LOVE And Promised To Be Faithful....If You Love Someone You Have To Do It 100% And Prepare For Heartbreak Because Life Is All About Taking Chances.

Here Is An Exercise From The Book You Can Try With Your Significant Other Guys And Gals:

Have You And Your Mate Grab A Piece Of Paper And A Pencil To Complete The Sentences Below ( Or You Can Do This Verbally). Write As Many Completions To Each Question As You Can Think Of ( Try For Five Each Question). Write Or Say Whatever Comes To Mind, As Quickly As Possible, Without Self Criticism Or Censorship.

• I Cant Let Go Because.........

• I am Holding Onto..........

• I Cant Trust My Partner Because.......

Share Your Answers With Your Partner. Learning About Your Hidden Fears Is The First Step To Being Free Of Them. The Next Step Is Talking About Them, Applying As Much Love As You Can, And Never, Never Making Fun Of Your Partner.

(So Feedback People.....Love Is A Risk For Surrrrre But If We Live In Constant Fear And Paranoia How Can A Relationship Benefit?)